For an audio version of this post, please click on the speaker icon (top left).

 

 

 

 

 

When speaking to physicians, residents, or medical students, Gross Anatomy conjures up mixed emotions.

One of the first courses a first year medical student is subject to is named, quite appropriately, Gross Anatomy, which spans the entire year.

It is common knowledge that you can instantly tell that you are in the presence of first year medical students (especially in the elevator) as they reek of formaldehyde.

That distinctive smell becomes ingrained in your clothes and pretty much every cell of your body.

Any attempts to mask the smell were futile.

During that year medical students become intimately familiar with the internal workings of the cadaver they are assigned to.

After peeling back layer upon layer of tissue we eventually got to the interesting anatomy, namely the internal organs.

Human anatomy definitely piqued my interest, as evidenced both by my original specialty choice of general surgery and my eventual career in radiology.

The gross anatomy of finance.

They say the heart, and in my case stomach, has a mind of its own.

And that became the inspiration for this post, using anthropomorphism and creative license to match internal organs with human financial behaviors.

The brain.

Ah, the seat of consciousness and intellect.

With 100 billion neurons at its disposal forming a vast network of connections, it is no wonder that the brain takes analyzing financial decisions to the extreme.

• Financial Benefit: 
  • Financial decisions are made logically with perceived benefits outweighing potential risks.
  • The brain prevents you from making rash decisions based on current fads or investing in the latest media outlet darling.
• Financial Downside:
  • Trying to analyze every possible financial permutation can be overwhelming and lead to analysis paralysis.

 

The heart.

The internal organ most associated with love/emotions.

• Financial Benefit:
  • When it is functioning at peak performance, the heart is the epitome for positive cashflow.
  • It takes a constant, coordinated effort to build up passive income cashflow which is right in the wheelhouse of the heart.
• Financial Downside:
  • The heart is prone to be influenced by emotions rather than logic.
    • This can lead the heart to make unwise decisions because of the fear of missing out (FOMO).

 

The lungs.

These vital organs help oxygenate the blood and remove harmful CO2 buildup in the body.

• Financial Benefit:
  • Tasked with keeping blood oxygenation balanced in the body, it is not too far a leap for the lungs to make sure our portfolios are held in check through timely rebalancing.
    • This insures that our investments remain within our desired allocation.
• Financial Downside:
  • Much like hyperventilation can have detrimental effects on the body, the lungs need to be kept in check to make sure they are not too aggressive with rebalancing.
    • This can lead to selling off winners too early to reap even more gains and catching falling knives in assets that are still plummeting.

 

The liver.

The liver acts like the gatekeeper, filtering out harmful chemicals that we may just happen to ingest.

The liver also helps in the storage of energy by converting excess glucose into glycogen.

• Financial Benefit:
  • By acting like the gatekeeper and taking on the brunt of toxic chemicals (an example is the liver becoming cirrhotic from alcohol abuse), the liver is altruistic, sacrificing itself for the protection of the greater good.
  • The liver therefore supports the decision to create an estate plan and will so that your financial legacy can be passed onto your heirs.
  • Similar to creating glycogen as a longer term storage of energy for later use when needed, the liver is completely on board with the creation of an Emergency Fund for those financial rainy days.
• Financial Downside:
  • The liver can sometimes go overboard in its mission, having far more stores of energy than will ever be used, resulting in a “fatty liver.”
  • A similar financial situation can occur if all we do is prioritize saving for tomorrow (which is not guaranteed) and not enjoying the journey/present day.

 

The spleen.

The spleen has many roles in human physiology, a sort of jack of all trades.

The spleen monitors the condition of red blood cells and removes damaged ones from the circulatory system.

The spleen is also an integral part of the immune system, helping to form and store white blood cells.

• Financial Benefit:
  • Because of its role in fighting off pathogens, the spleen takes everything it encounters with a grain of salt and does not trust anything or anyone.
  • The spleen protects you from making reckless decisions such as forgoing due diligence when evaluating real estate syndications, etc.
  • The spleen laughs at the whole-life insurance salesperson knowing that this is just another financial pathogen.
• Financial Downside:
  • The spleen can sometimes get too big for its own britches, splenomegaly, and can rupture or cause other pathology.
  • With its inability to trust, the spleen makes you doubt yourself on whether your portfolio can support you in retirement, which leads you to “One More Year” Syndrome.
    • You therefore work longer than you have to and end up with a nest egg far larger than you need, raising concern for becoming the richest person in the graveyard.

 

The kidneys.

Far less glamorous than the liver, the kidneys also function to help detoxify the human body by filtering blood and removing harmful chemicals such as ammonia.

The kidneys really do take a backseat to all the other organs in the abdomen, delegated to the very posterior of the body in the retroperitoneal space.

Kidneys really are treated like the red-headed stepchild by the rest of intra-abdominal organs who reside in the intraperitoneal space of the body.

• Financial Benefit:
  • The kidneys are used to working behind the scenes to achieve their vital mission.
  • The kidneys would therefore fully be supportive of the 60/40 (stock:bond) index funds that are important to any portfolio but do not have the glitz and glamor of individual stocks such as Tesla, Apple, or actively managed funds.
• Financial Downside:
  • The kidneys are very susceptible to changes in the system.
  • Renal calculi can form and block the drainage pathway causing intense pain and possible infection.
  • Blindly following a 60/40 stock:bond index ratio may lead to trouble as future returns, especially in the bond market, are not likely to match past performances which can put your nest egg at risk.

 

The stomach.

The principal component of the gastrointestinal system, the stomach’s main objective is to break down ingested food into its core nutrients to be later absorbed by the body.

• Financial Benefit:
  • The stomach prioritizes creating an investment policy statement that allows you to break down your portfolio into specific asset allocations (such as stocks, bonds, real estate, and alternatives).
• Financial Downside:
  • When your net worth grows and fills your stomach, you are content only for a little while.
    • This creates a risk for always moving your financial goal posts as greed/financial hunger quickly returns.

 

The reproductive organs.

Now we’re talking.

Once certain hormones hit, all things to do with sex encompasses 90% of the thought processes of adolescent boys and grown men alike.

The male genitalia is a testament to the wonders of hydraulics.

The female genitalia is a testament to preparing for the future.

• Financial Benefit (XY):
  • What better analogy is there for achieving wealth than showing what can happen when you reduce outflow while having a steady inflow?
    • With this biological and financial concept, new heights can be achieved both literally and figuratively.
• Financial Downside (XY):
  • If you take on the characteristics of the male genitalia, you have an immense desire to visit as many exotic places as possible, even if you cannot afford to do so.
  • An unfortunate outcome may be picking up a $TD (dollar trend down).

• Financial Benefit (XX):
  • The womb is a safe haven that provides nourishment and protection from any negative external forces.
  • The womb therefore prioritizes creating multiple sources of income, in case one income stream fails, building up a sizeable nest egg to support you throughout retirement, and creating a sufficient emergency fund.
• Financial Downside (XX):
  • Having all your eggs in one basket may result in financial disaster in case of a black swan event.

 

The others.

There are of course many other organs that I did not mention, such as the thyroid gland, adrenal gland, and pancreas.

The latter organ I refuse to acknowledge as it was the cause for my father’s death at the age of 50 and does not deserve to have a place of honor in this post.

Feel free to add any organs I may have missed and their financial pros/cons in the comments below.

 

 

 

 

Note:

If you are in search of financial help, please consider enlisting the service of any of the sponsors of this blog who I feel are part of the “good guys and gals of finance.”

Even a steadfast DIY’er can sometimes gain benefit from the occasional professional input.

 

 

-Xrayvsn